DYING PARROT

"Oh yes, goodnight my adorable little winged reptilian freak creature! You're a million years old and your piercing dinosaur eyes are as black as coal — insectile, perhaps, except you're also really smart so you've probably thought a lot about how you could kill me. I mean, hey, you'd have had the time! Surely it would have crossed your mind at least once. Anyhow, you're dying now, gross bird. Bye!"